17 Nov Life in Santiago

I went to the internet cafe a few doors up from where I am living. I was surprised to find the guy running the cafe was keen to communicate with me. He made an effort to use the internet to translate spanish to english. He showed me his message. He wanted to know more about me. I had told him I travelled the world on my own. He was fascinated that I was able to do this without the local language. He was curious about my view about the Pinochet years. I was surprised at the question as I had just finished a blog on my viewpoint. I wrote in english my view of this and translated it into spanish. I told him I am a peace clown and my belief that fear drives dictatorship and the US elite behind the fear of communism at the time. I also can see that capitalism took hold in Chile so they become partners in the market rather than a threat ideologically. Yet in reality democracy is the greater security than a market system, in truth the market system is not sustainable and it does not generate real happiness, it promotes greed and violence backs it up, that is very clear. People keep reaching for material things outside of themselves to find some sense of satisfaction but in reality the emptiness actually grows the more they grasp. We begin to find peace when we look within and develop our inner values and love of self and others. This i have no doubt about as it has been a transformation within myself where i never feel alone or bored and am continually fascinated by my life expanding. My fear is slowly disappearing as I start to see more and more the beauty of life and how supportive it really is when you let go of fear. There is much I would have loved to have explained but time was short and language is a barrier, however it was timely he chose to make the approach as i had to leave where i was staying for the next place. He shook my hand vigorously and I could see he was affected emotionally. There is so much depth to people, I am continually amazed how interested people are in what is happening in the world and the views of others. It is clear people around the globe need to communicate more, they will find their concerns and aspirations for peace very similar. We are all one, this i feel intuitively and unity will catalyse huge changes.

I organised another couch and met my new friend Jorge. I caught the train to his place. I found myself on the train and it went past the station, i couldnt believe it. I tried to get off and get on again and see if I was able to stop at the station. I had no idea how to walk there with my case. It is a big case and lugging it around is exhausting particularly at the moment whilst i am unwell. I had to pull the thing up stairs, one after the other and had some concerns about the wheels breaking. No way i could lift the case. My juggling gear weigh’s me down, well actually it uplifts me. Anyway, i was curious to see if anyone would offer help with my bag. So I lug it up the stairs and observe the people in the corner of my eye. Just curious. Most walked passed and didnt look, interesting, then i see a man running to help me. There is my angel and he helps me up the stairs. He was quite cute too I have to say. We tried to communicate but it was difficult, I cant be sure i am understood. I was trying to say the train kept missing the station. Anyway he advised me to catch it back, which I did and too my amazement it actually stopped. Then I was able to ring Jorge and there he was waiting. He took me to his house in an apartment block. Showed me my room, so nice to have a room rather than a couch in a loungeroom. I even have a bathroom, luxury. He shows me the kitchen and lets me use his laptop for internet. I was relieved to be able to finally download my photos onto my external drive, not having my laptop is like losing my right arm, anyway, i am deeply grateful.

I then meet Faith the flatmate, or I should say grace. Turns out she is a Quaker volunteering here to work with disadvantaged people. What a wonderful girl. We go out for Indian food, I really love that. We talk about peace. She has studied Peace Studies and attended a Quaker school. She is very aware of being inspired by the source and living the peace rather than talking about it. We find outselves smiling in agreement. I told her about my life and how I feel very much carried and it is just getting more amazing. We had a really lovely time together and returned to the flat. I went to bed but didnt sleep all night. The window wouldn’t shut and I had the city sounds just crashing in. It was like having the bed on the street and watching the traffic go by. I tried putting on my Ipod to try and at least enjoy the time whilst lying there awake. I was worried about my cold getting worse as i have been sick for 4 weeks now. Just hanging around it is, the less sleep i get the worse it gets. So in the morning finally my body succumbed to the inevitable, aaah sleep. I got up around 1.30pm. I went for a nice walk around this arty farty area. I love street cafe’s and took a book with me. I am doing research and constantly working on peace within myself. I am monitoring my thoughts and when i feel any negativity or projection arise, i look at it. This is how we create peace in the world, we work on ourselves. The negativity rises from ourselves not the world outside. We make judgements and interpretations which are mostly wrong. So I am looking deeply into myself and constantly reflecting on how we live in a way that is in harmony with the planet. This is extremely important as the current system and state of play doesn’t work. That is clear.

I spent a lovely afternoon in deep reflection and felt the joy within. I so love this work in peace it is my joy. I went for a long walk investigating the area and then headed back to the apartment. I collapsed onto the lounge and had a good rest watching a soap opera in Spanish. Had no idea of what they were saying but could feel the humour and laughed. That should do my cold good.

Anyway, Jorge turns up and eventually he comes and we talk. I got out my world ticket and told him about my journey. This is his dream to travel the world. He worked for 20 years and supported his family. He has a daughter. He feels desperate to get out and feel the freedom. I told him about the real freedom which is found in happiness. Happiness is not just cutting loose from jobs, people etc. it is giving yourself permission to do what you love. To follow desire, to follow the heart and express your true meaning. He understood that when he finds happiness this gives his daughter a role model. He is right. I do not believe in sacrificing and living an unhappy life, as children learn this as the model of life. It is not the model of happiness. It is not selfish to travel and find yourself, it is wisdom. We don’t actually grow up until we are around 40 or 50 years old. Most of life is questing as we are searching for our own truth, it is impossible to pass on wisdom and truth if you don’t know it yourself. So going out and exploring life is a wonderful mirror. You are faced with challenges and fears and it shows you who you are. I highly recommend it.

We then talked about clowning, Jorge noticed as I started to express my joy in clowning my face lite up. He commented that I came to life. That is because this is my love shining. I have such a love of bringing joy to others, it is fantastic, it unlocks my joy as well when i see them smile. I pulled out my juggling clubs, balls, rings and toys that I often take out clowning. I demonstrated a few clown walks and he put on the stethoscope. Then he puts on my clown nose. I put on the flashing clown nose and my love glasses and the two of us take a photo. It was fun and I really connect to the light energy I feel as a clown. It is my true self and I miss it at the moment as I can’t get out there and clown. But patience, sickness first, clowning second, hmmm There is a clowning conference on here so I will go and check out what the other clowns are doing. I can always tell the real ones, they do it for love. Many do it for money or they love to perfect the tricks and techniques. All equally wonderful and joy giving, but for me the real clowning is heart to heart connection. I love the feeling of equality with everyone from little children to old people. I love to see them free whilst they smile and forget their responsibilities. I told Jorge about my REAL HOPE work in schools with children. This is peace education. I particularly emphasised for him what responsibility means, the ability to respond, it is not about carrying the weight of responsibility. I told him each person is responsible for their own life and there is a divine plan (for want of another word) to their lives. We do not have to carry people. Children yes, they are vulnerable and we do have to ensure they receive a healthy and balanced life experience. They are the future. However, we are here to explore and express who we really are and if we are unhappy that potential is blocked. Just imagine what the world looks like when you express your love and passion. It would look totally different to the one we are in.

Anyway kiddies, I have to finish up my internet cafe is telling me i must pay $1700 for this. Sounds a lot, I always laugh, it is actually around $4 AUD. So I can feel some relief.

Be happy and find what you love, that is the greatest service you can do for humanity. When you are happy, creativity activates and the world becomes an incredible playground. Much love and laughter.